One of the most important things parents can teach their children is respect. And respect is not the same as obedience. Children might obey because they are afraid. However if they respect you, they will obey because they know that you have their best interest at heart.
The best way to teach respect is to show respect. When our children experience respect, they know what it feels like and begin to understand how important it is.
Respect is an attitude. Being respectful helps a child not only succeed in school but also later in life. If children don't have respect for peers, authority, or themselves, it's almost impossible for them to succeed. A respectful child takes care of belongings and responsibilities, and a respectful child gets along with others.
Al thought schools teach children about respect, parents play a significant role and have the most influence on molding their children to become respectful individuals. Until children show respect at home, it's unlikely they will show it outside the home.
Respecting your child
Learning to treat children with respect will require a change of heart, that can come only from a major shift in consciousness of how we see our children and how we define respect.
Like adults, children have human dignity too. To treat a person with respect is to acknowledge and preserve their human dignity. To treat a person with disrespect is to attack their human dignity.
If we want to bring out respectful children, we must first be respectful parents, teachers and care givers.
Children are our mirrors. they reflect back to us everything we say and do. 95% of everything our children learn, they learn from what is modeled for them. Only 5% of all they learn is from direct instruction. We are role models for our children. What we speak is what we teach. Children record every word we ever say to them or in front of them. The language children grow up hearing is the language they will speak.
How can you show respect to your child?
- Be positive. Don't embarrass, insult or make fun of your child. Compliment him or her.
- Be honest. If you do something wrong, admit it and apologize.
- Be trusting. Let your child makes choices and take responsibility.
- Be reliable. Keep promises that you make. Show your child that you mean what you say.
- Be fair. Listen to your child's side of the story before reaching a conclusion.
- Be polite. Use 'please' and 'thank you.' Knock before entering your child's room.
- Be a good listener. Give your child your full attention.
More Respect Tactics
When you set rules at home, explain to your child why the rule is important. For example, if you have a rule that says 'No taking of dinner in front of the TV,' do explain that this is because dinner time is the time for everyone to get together, catch up on what has happened during the talk, to talk and to show care and love for one another in the family.
• Teach your children to respect themselves. Self-respect is one of the most important forms of respect. Once we respect ourselves, it is easier to respect others.
• Help them set and achieve goals. Their self-respect will skyrocket when they see themselves achieving those goals.
• Encourage honesty and integrity. Let your children know that they may be able to fool some people, but they can't fool themselves. There is no pride in stealing, cheating or lying.
• Your opinion means a lot to your children. If you believe your children can succeed, they will believe they can as well. Build their independence. Give them responsibilities as soon as they can handle them.
• Most importantly, show love! Say "I Love You" often, and give plenty of hugs and kisses. If your child makes a mistake, remind them that they are still loved.
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
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