Saturday, July 12, 2008

Forgive & Forget - A key to better relationship

  1. Forgiving is allowing another person to be human for faults, mistakes, or misdeeds. Forgetting is putting these behind you; they are no longer brought up and no longer remain a barrier to your relationship

  2. Forgiving is letting another know that there is no grudge, hard feelings, or animosity for any wrong doing. Forgetting is the lack of further discussion, with no on going negative references to the event

  3. Forgiving is letting the other person know that you accept as genuine the remorse and sorrow for actions or words that hurt or disappointed you. Forgetting is promising that this deed, whether of omission or commission, will not be brought up again

  4. Forgiving is accepting the sincerity of penance, sorrow, and regret expressed over a grievous personal offense; making it sufficient to clear the air. Forgetting is your commitment to let go of anger, hurt, and pain over this offense

  5. Forgiving is giving a sign that a person's explanation or acceptance of blame for a destructive, hurtful, or painful act is fully accepted. Forgetting is the development of a plan of action between the two of you to heal the scars resulting from the behavior

  6. Forgiving is the highest form of human behavior that can be shown to another person. It is the opening up of yourself to that person to be vulnerable to being hurt or offended in the future, yet setting aside this in order to reopen and heal the channels of communication. Forgetting is equally as high a human behavior; it is letting go of the need to seek revenge for past offenses

  7. Forgiving is the act of love between you and a person who has hurt you; the bandage that holds the wound together long enough to heal. Forgetting is also an act of love; in rehabilitation therapy, helping the wounded return to a full, functional, living reality

  8. Forgiving is the God like gift of spiritually connecting with others, touching their hearts to calm the fear of rejection, quiet the sense of failure, and lighten the burden of guilt. Forgetting is the God like gift of spiritually touching others' hearts with the reassurance of a happy and full life with no fear of recrimination, remonstrations, or reminding of past offenses

  9. Forgiving is the act of letting go of temporary ill will, disappointment, or the disgust that arises from the break in your relationship. Forgetting is bridging this gap in the relationship, eventually strengthening it against such a break in the future

  10. Forgiving is an act of compassion, humanity, and gentleness by which you let another know that she/he is indeed a child of the universe upon whom a variety of graces and blessings have been showered and that current or past offenses need not be a barrier preventing goodness and worth to shine through. Forgetting is the act of encouragement, support, and reinforcement by which you assist the other person to rebuild, reconnect and re-establish a loving, caring, healthy relationship with you, others, and the world whereby gifts, talents, and skills are freely appreciated and shared
Negative Consequences of the absences of forgiving and forgetting. In the absence of forgiving and forgetting, the partners in a relationship run the risk of:
  • Continuously being hurt with pain and suffering going unresolved

  • Unresolved guilt and remorse for offenses committed

  • Chronically seeking revenge and paybacks from one another

  • Being caught up in unresolved anger, animosity, and bitterness

  • Defensive, self-protective, and distant behavior

  • Blaming, negative and non-growth oriented behavior

  • Being stuck in a battlefield stockpiled for future offensive attacks

  • Being lost in a festering wound that never realizes the revitalization of healing

  • Secretive and non-communicative behavior

  • Fear over making a mistake or of having the mistake revealed

  • Being overwhelmed by fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of non-approval, low self-esteem, fear of conflict & High stress
So, Forgive someone today and post about how you did it to encourage more to do the same that may lead us all join our hand without any difference in developing trouble free Universe.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

The quote is really mind striking.
NIRMAL
---------
Digital Infosys

Saravanan said...

Thanks for your words Nirmal. This is just another way. For any relationship the most important quality that one must poses on top of everything is LOVE. It is the real KEY. Agree with me?

Anonymous said...

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Sorry for offtopic

Saravanan said...

Hi,

Thank you for your compliment.

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Keep visiting.

Rgds
Sara

Anonymous said...

Great post! The difficulty with forgiving someone is so hard, but there seems to be peace. I really enjoy your insight on this. I’d love to read more on this topic.

I recently stumbled upon another blog like I stumbled upon yours and I really appreciated their insihgt. I thought you might enjoy it: http://burisonthecouch.wordpress.com/2010/11/17/forgiveness/

I’d love to see more like it. Thanks!